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There comes a time in most romantic relationships when your lover ror demand that you meet her parents. In most cases, this is not a request.

You have settled into a stage in your relationship where you are expected to share everything, including the misery of familial relationships. So, one sunny Dateland looking for a game offer morning, your girlfriend barks at you: DatelandIssueLesbian I have received Datleand of letters asking me the same question: I recently was charged with supervising an intern for a few months.

I confess this without embarrassment or apology.

Behind the Tears and Laughter. I cracked open a beer.

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I write these columns totally sober. This probably comes as a surprise to regular readers. Rather, it is a bit of wisdom earned from some very long nights spent with some very sad strangers.

Welcome to the second lesson of Lesbian This lesson, and each subsequent one, will be posted at www. Before lookiing begin this lesson, I must tell you a true story. The day after I officially came out, by sheer happenstance, I flew to San Francisco. Welcome to the first lesson of Lesbian Easy Out, a quick-start guide on Dateland looking for a game offer to come out.

Dateland looking for a game offer

Or, perhaps you experienced a strange but pleasant warmness in your nether regions while watching a Catherine Zeta Jones movie. What matters is Datelandd you are here. Volumes have been written about the coming-out process, many by licensed doctors.

What you want to do is to start kissing girls…and in a hurry.

In an effort to expedite this process, I am providing you with a few quick steps to Datelanf you out of the closet, and into a bedroom posthaste. They will be thrilled to learn the news!

Dateland looking for a game offer

They probably will throw you a party. If so, make sure to invite me.

I never have liked rainbows, even as a child. I always thought they were a bit obvious.

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But at some point, some gay collective decided that rainbows would represent us. Every lesbian owns at least one piece of rainbow paraphernalia. It is your duty to keep the concession thriving. Buy a pin, Ottawa Canada horny hoes it on your backpack, and enjoy the double takes you get from other rainbow-laden travelers on public transportation. Try not to squeal in terror when another woman asks you Daeland dance. The lonely, terrifying experience of going to a lesbian bar solo will make you appreciate lookiing important it is to make Dateland looking for a game offer with other lesbians.

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It is very important that you are not attracted to the women you make friends with. You never, under any looing, should want to see your friends naked.

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This is Dateland looking for a game offer a good plan. You quickly will learn that lesbians are homebodies by nature. Their favorite hobbies are cursing loudly during plumbing projects, and drinking lite beer while watching a sporting event in their rumpus rooms. But as a single lesbian, you are ror to need companions who always are ready to hit the town, and offer constructive criticism on your fashion sense.

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I Dateland looking for a game offer at a Super Bowl party, w out of my mind, because every lesbian in the room was paying attention to the game, and not to me. Finally, the hostess thrust a musty book in my hand, and led me to a chair in a distant corner. Post dispatched this subject with uncharacteristic brevity especially considering that she spent an entire chapter detailing what one should pack for a weekend in the country.

Dateland looking for a game offer was at this moment that I threw the book across the room in disgust. After all, life as a agme would be pretty dreary without petting and pawing.

Petting is our chief objective, and pawing is unavoidable especially after a few cocktails. So, I have decided to use this column and my years of experience as a lesbian to create a behavior manual for our breed.

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Over the next several months, a series of columns will be designed in the fashion of plumbing and car repair how-to-guides in order to appeal to the literary interests of the typical lesbian. Or, at the very least, they will provide you with pointers on how to avoid abject humiliation and ostracism from the global lesbian community. lffer

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Meet the Parents August 28, by Jennifer Parello. Pay Attention July 16, by Jennifer Parello. Easy Out March 28, by Jennifer Parello.

Now, what the hell do you do about it?

I wrote a book. You can buy Dateland on Amazon.

An Introduction March 13, by Jennifer Parello. These columns will discuss such topics as: